Seth Meyers Likens Trump to a Bad Houseguest

Seth Meyers Likens Trump to a Bad Houseguest

Seth Meyers Likens Trump to a Bad Houseguest

Seth Meyers Likens Trump to a Bad Houseguest

Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. We’re all stuck at home at the moment, so here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.

On Thursday, President Trump visited a Ford factory in Michigan that’s making face masks. Before boarding his chopper on the White House lawn, reporters asked about his latest Covid-19 test.

“And I tested very positively in another sense,” Trump said. “So this morning, I tested positively toward negative, right? So, no, I tested perfectly this morning. Meaning I tested negative. But that’s a way of saying it: Positively toward the negative.”

“Which makes me wonder, exactly how deep do they push that swab?” Seth Meyers said in his “Late Night” monologue on Thursday night.

[imitating Trump] When it comes to being negative, my test was extremely positive, because, not to be negative, but, being positive would be super negative, and I wouldn’t want to not be unnegative. Of that, I’m positive — in a negative way.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Even his negatives are positive, isn’t that something?” — JIMMY KIMMEL

Then in Michigan, Trump appeared at the plant without a mask, though he said he’d worn one off-camera.

“Trump and Vice President Mike Pence have repeatedly refused to wear masks in settings where they were required or where everyone around them was wearing one. Put aside the fact that Trump and Pence are ignoring their own government’s guidelines on mask-wearing, or the stupid conservative culture war over masks: Why do you guys have to be such [expletive] about everything? Just be polite. If you go over to someone’s house and they ask you to take your shoes off, you take your shoes off, and then you quietly make a mental note that you’re not going to any more of Sharon’s game nights. You don’t make a big show of leaving them on and tracking mud everywhere.” — SETH MEYERS

“The attorney general in Michigan said Trump had a legal, social and moral responsibility to wear one when he visited the plant. So of course, he didn’t.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“Yesterday, Trump was asked about his threat to halt federal funding to Michigan because of their plan to encourage Michiganders to vote by mail. Trump doesn’t want that. He wants fewer people to vote, and he also wants to be able to claim fraud if he loses. But that’s not the weird thing. The weird thing is while doing it for the umpteenth time, he made the unsubstantiated claim that Michigan once named him ‘Man of the Year.’” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“He remembers it so well, but there is no evidence he was ever honored with an award like that of any kind. This has been investigated extensively and it would appear, and you’re not gonna believe this, it would appear he made it up. He was never ‘Man of the Year.’ But that doesn’t mean he won’t say he was every single chance he gets.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“According to former Congressman Dave Trott, the man who presented Trump with the thing he remembers so well, there was no ‘Michigan Man of the Year’ award. What he gave Trump was a framed copy of President Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. [as Trump] ‘I want to thank President Lincoln for naming me Michigan’s man of the year. This reminds of the time the D.M.V. gave me a beautiful plastic card naming me People’s “Sexiest Man Alive.” I keep it in my wallet with the Applebee’s coupon naming me the pope of chicken wings.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“The Late Show” gave us a look at the latest virtual commencement speech from a celebrity: John Malkovich addressing Play ’n Learn Preschool’s Class of 2020.

Source link

Check Also

The Essential Spike Lee - The New York Times

The Essential Spike Lee – The New York Times

The Essential Spike Lee – The New York Times The Essential Spike Lee – The …