“Donald Trump is clearly upset that he can’t hold rallies anymore now that attendance is so bad they look like Tuesday afternoon Mets games. So, yesterday, he lured reporters to the Rose Garden by pretending to hold a press conference, but decided instead to hold a little campaign rally for himself, which quickly devolved into yet another one of his trademark psychotic meltdowns.” — SETH MEYERS

“And instead of a press conference, people said it was more like a campaign rally in front of 20 people. In other words, it was just like Tulsa.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Usually when you see something like that on TV, it ends with a voice saying, ‘It’s time to ask your doctor if Abilify is right for you.’” — JIMMY FALLON

“Seriously, if that were a wedding toast, the groom would have wrestled the mic away after 10 seconds.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Normally when a 74-year-old man spends an hour yelling in his garden, his family is like, ‘Time to go look for some homes for Grandpa.’” — JIMMY FALLON

The Bits Worth Watching

Stephen Colbert bade farewell to Jeff Sessions in his Wednesday night monologue.

What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night

The Chicks will play a track from their new album, “Gaslighter,” on Thursday’s “Late Show.”

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